Yesterday, I was reading a fan website and someone was commenting on the entertainer in question’s wife. There was a picture of her on the red carpet with her husband and beneath it, a fan of her husband’s had written, “Die, Bitch, Die!”

Normally, when I see a comment like that, I glaze over and scroll away from it. But this time, I felt kicked in the stomach. Why? Because she’s a dear, sweet friend of mine (and one of the LAST people on earth I’d ever think of as a bitch—let alone one that should be (ouch!) killed for it). I suspect she doesn’t spend much time googling herself online, so she probably stays away from sites like this one (after all, she’s got a gaggle of kids to raise and a husband to support). But it brought home a subject that comes up for my clients a lot: how to deal with nasty comments from people.

What to do about it varies from person to person. For some, staying away from fan sites is a biggie, for others, wearing headphones on the street helps a lot. A few others outlaw TV at TMZ time. But most of my clients slip at some point and find themselves getting enraged at the chatter they hear & see about themselves…

Why? Because they’re sensitive, feeling people who—at least in their weaker moments—take the comments pinned to their names personally.

The truth is, I don’t know all that many people who are happy to see something like “Die, Bitch, Die!” written about them. No matter how misguided it is.

So, since we can’t all go around like the three blind mice all the time and we may get sideswiped by hateful comments, what’s the best way to deal with it so our day isn’t wrecked?

Again, it varies from client to client, but the best place to start is with envisioning what kind of environment you WANT to be in every day. If that environment consists of loving friends and positive feedback, how could you add more of that to your life? If a perfect day for you includes email but NOT celebrity target practice, how can you change your homepage and surfing habits to insulate yourself from accidentally (or intentionally!) reading “Die, Bitch, Die” comments about you while you’re poking around on the net?

Starting from the environment you WANT to be living in has been the most effective ways my clients to start counteracting the ill effects of celeb-bashing that has been surrounding them.

This entry was posted on Monday, August 25th, 2008 at 6:52 pm and is filed under Balance, Celebrity Crucifixion, Family, Fans, Self-Esteem. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.